41 Funny Yoga Quotes to Lighten Up Your Practice

funny yoga quotes

I have rounded up these funny yoga quotes from various sources on the internet and social media, with a few from my own experience thrown in the mix

The worst thing you can do when practising yoga is take yourself too seriously. There’s even such a thing as laughter yoga nowadays. But I can find the humour in pretty much any yoga class.

And apparently, so can many others, as you’ll see in the following funny quotes. Yoga jokes may be a bit of a stretch (get it?), but here we go.

Whatever you do, please don’t roll your third eye at me.

Wanna hear some yoga quotes? I’m down, dog.

  1. Let’s start with this one, attributed to the yogi, Sadhguru:

“Yoga class helps me calm down from the agonizing stress of trying to get to yoga class on time.”

I can relate to that one all too well. I’m always rushing to yoga class, which seems ironic, doesn’t it?

What is Yoga?

2. I love this 4-yr old kid’s explanation of yoga:

funny yoga quotes
  1. “What yoga really is: Spending an entire hour trying not to fart.”  – Unknown
  1. “Yoga is 99% waste removal” — T.K.V Desikachar
  1. “Yoga is not about tightening your ass.  It’s about getting your head out of it.” – Eric Paskel

Why Do Yoga?

  1. “I do yoga to burn off the crazy.” – Unknown
  1. “Yoga. Because punching people is frowned upon.” – Unknown
  1. “Yoga is my favourite way to pretend to work out.” – Unknown
  1. “I bend so I don’t break.” – Unknown
  1. “Yoga is not about tightening your ass.  It’s about getting your head out of it.” – Eric Paskel
funny yoga quotes
  1. “It’s funny when people think ‘yoga people’ are supposed to be calm. No. We’re all here because we’re nuts!” – Unknown
  1. “I do Yoga to relieve stress… Just kidding I drink wine in yoga pants.” – Unknown
  1. “A day without yoga is like a sundae without sprinkles” – Emma Mildon

On Yoga and Meditation

  1. “I meditate and do yoga. I sit cross-legged and try not to levitate too much.” – Jeremy Brett
  1. “I talked to a wild group last night. I knew it the minute someone yelled ‘Louder!’ during the silent meditation.  – Robert Orben”
  1. “Meditation, because some questions can’t be answered by Google.” – Inner Balance Wear
funny yoga quotes
  1. One meditator to another: Are you not thinking what I’m not thinking? – Unknown
  1. “I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment.” – Gautama Buddha

What the Stars Say about Yoga

  1. “I do an hour’s yoga and go running every day. Then I see a picture of myself and I still look like a skinny, pot bellied idiot — and I thought I had turned into this superhunk!” – Chris Martin
  1. “When I’m under stress, I do yoga. It’s when I’m happiest that I have a problem with junk food.” – Britney Spears
  1. “I think yoga should be for everyone, not just the folks who change their name to something Hindu.” – Tara Stiles

And my favourite:

  1. “I like tea and yoga, but I don’t do yoga.” – Moby

In Case You Were Wondering…

  1. “How to get a yoga body: 1. Have a body 2. Do yoga.” – Unknown
  1. Any yoga I do is hot yoga. (I can relate to this one!) – Unknown
  1. “I’m not napping. This is savasana!” – Unknown
  1. “Sorry for what I said before I yoga-ed.” – Unknown

Yoga Pants

  1. “Yoga pants. Because jeans are stressful and you don’t need that in your life.” – Unknown
  1. “Some days you eat salads and do yoga. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. It’s called balance.” – Unknown
  1. “Three things that never lie: Little kids, drunk people, and yoga pants.” – Unknown

Yoga Teachers Say the Darndest Things

  1. “An instructor once gave the following cue in yoga class: “Relax your pancreas.” I don’t even know where my pancreas is, never mind how to relax it! I giggled for the rest of the class.” – Mel Farrimond
  1. “Yoga instructor just emailed to say class is moved and thanks for our flexibility.” – Unknown
  1. I rang up a yoga instructor and asked which class I should take. She said, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t do Tuesdays.” – Unknown
funny yoga quotes
  1. “Me to my students every day: Close your eyes. If you can still see me, it could be a sign that your eyes are still open.” – Unknown

A Few More Funny Yoga Quotes

  1. “I tried yoga once but took off for the mall halfway through class, as I had a sudden craving for a soft pretzel and world peace.” -Terri Guillemets
  1. “Thanks to yoga, I now gently stretch to conclusions rather than jumping to them.”  – Unknown
  1. “Yoga teaches us to cure what need not be endured and endure what cannot be cured.”  – B.K.S. Iyengar
  1. “When Chuck Norris does yoga, the sun salutes him.” – Unknown
  1. “Sign for a beginner’s yoga class: Enquire Within.” – Unknown
  1. “I remember when yoga was called Twister.” – Unknown
  1. “I got chucked out of yoga class after misinterpreting Half-Moon Pose.” – Unknown

And one for our days of social distancing

  1. “Namastay 6 feet away.” – Unknown

Yoga Jokes

A couple of jokes to conclude.

What do yoga pants eat for dessert? Lululemon meringue pie.  

Question: How many Iyengar yogis does it take to replace a light bulb?

Answer: Only one – but he will need a sticky mat, a backless chair, five blankets, a bolster, six ropes, two belts, six assorted benches, three weights, and a certificate.  

The Final Word on Funny Yoga Quotes

So, there you have it. Yoga is not to be taken too seriously. Have some fun with it. You might even enjoy it!

I hope some of these quotes and jokes made you smile. After all, as Thich Nhat Hanh said, “Smiling is mouth yoga.”

Author

  • Mel Farrimond loves all kinds of writing: creative, academic, freelancing, and blogging. She has her own blog, The MONDAY Blog at www.themondayblog.com, covering music, oeuvres, news, dining, art and yoga.

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